denverc

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Looking for: friendship
Zodiac sign: libra
Birthday: 09-30
Joined: 2014-07-28
What happens in quarantine stays in quarantine !!!!!!
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The benefits of alcohol !!!!!!!!!!

2021-02-26       

A father was trying to teach his young son the evils of alcohol. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived, while the one in whiskey curled up and died. "All right, son." asked the father, "what does that show you?"

"Well, Dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms."

Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.

2021-02-07       

Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.

He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself.
However, the gates are closed and Forrest approaches the Gatekeeper.
St. Peter says, "Well, Forrest, it's certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we've been administering an entrance examination for everyone.
The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."

Forrest responds, "It shor is good to be here , St. Peter, sir.
But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam.
Shor hope the test ain't too hard; life was a big enough test as it was."

St. Peter goes on, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions:

First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T?

Second: How many seconds are there in a year?

Third: What is God's first name?"

Forrest leaves to think the questions over.
He returns the next day and sees St. Peter who waves him up and says, "Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."

Forrest says, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the week begin with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one's easy. That'd be Today and Tomorrow."

The Saint's eyes open wide and he exclaims, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn't specify, so I'll give you credit for that answer.
How about the next one?" asks St. Peter.

"How many seconds in a year?"

"Now that one's harder," says Forrest, "but I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve."

Confounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve!?
Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forrest says "Shucks, there's gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd,March 2nd. . ."

"Hold it, " interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I see your point, though that wasn't quite what I had in mind.....but I'll have to give you credit for that one, too.
Let's go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?

"Sure" Forrest replied, "its Andy."

Andy?!" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. "Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"

"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied.
"I learnt it from the song. . . . "ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN. . . ."

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: "Run Forrest, run."

It's Hell To Get Old

2021-02-04       
https://youtu.be/OOgd9hitEAE?t=164

BAD DAY FISHING

2021-02-02       
https://youtu.be/iK_h-2kot6s?t=95

Prayers Needed

2020-12-21       
In hospital with brain aneurysm.  

77822372.jpg

"Achmed The Dead Terrorist: Jingle Bombs

2020-12-09       
https://youtu.be/pH1Zaef7XXA?t=290

Elvis Presley, Martina McBride - Blue Christmas

2020-12-07       
https://youtu.be/3KK6sMo8NBY?t=83

12 days of covid Christmas

2020-12-04       
https://youtu.be/4HTy60lcU3U?t=130

A Cajun Christmas

2020-12-03       
https://youtu.be/3d3Dt9Dvrm0?t=42

something to think about

2020-11-23       
 What is the difference between Election day and Thanksgiving day?
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   On Thanksgiving, you get a turkey for the day; on Election day, you get a turkey for four years.
                  

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