jane_and.the_dragon

 
joined: 2014-04-15
Worry about your character, not your reputation. Your character is who you are, your reputation is who people think you are. ht
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THE UNCONTROLLABLE NEED TO BLOG

     Have you ever been struck with the uncontrollable need to blog?   This morning is one of those mornings when I have been hit with the uncontrollable need to blog.   I had a really bad day yesterday that I will not bore you with, followed by way too much chocolate last night, and woke up later then I planned to this morning.    As a result instead of jumping into what I had planned to do today like a normal person would do I am sitting here writing this blog because I feel the uncontrollable need to blog.
     I was in an emotional turmoil last night because of events beyond my control.   That is why I ate the chocolate.   It was a bad depression, but it did what I wanted it to at the time.   It pushed my sugar level up high enough I actually got some sleep.   Unfortunately for me I slept longer then planned.
     Have you ever been hurt by the actions of friends that really had nothing to do with you directly , but you were the one that had to deal with the fall out from it?   Let me give you an example:   When my nieces were in their teens they got in a fight.   I never knew what the fight was about.   They fought a lot.   After the fight they arrived at my other nieces birthday party.   I asked them to pose together so I could take a picture of them together.   I take many pictures, and I had not seen them in a while so yea I needed a new one.   My younger niece flatly refused to pose with her sister for me.   I was very hurt.  She said she was not posing with her cause she was mad at her.  OK she was mad at her sister, but I was the one being hurt.   I wanted the picture.      Her sister did not care one way or the other she would have posed for me.   This goes to show when you act in anger you realllllllllllly should take a look at what you plan to do first and see who will be the ones that are really hurt by your actions.   Will it be the ones you intended to hurt or will it be others who you claim to still love?
     Anger is a strange thing.   I believe it comes from the part of your brain that wants what it wants when it wants it and it does not care about what anyone else wants.   Never mind if you hurt those you love or crush someone else's dreams as long as you get back at the person that made you mad.     I understand that feeling too well.   The difference between me and many is when I hurt someone I did not mean to I feel bad about it and work to fix it.
     One night I blew apart a friend of mine's net world in a fit of anger and then spent the next 2 hours undoing what I had done in one action.   One should always stand accountable for their actions, and I do. 
     Have you ever noticed how people get defensive if you try to point out to them what they are doing is not a good idea?   I really think it is deep somewhere inside the human species to think they are always right EVEN if they do not want to admit that to themselves lol.   You think I am kidding you?  Try this start a sentence to a friend with the words WHY DID YOU DO ... then finish the sentence with something they actually did.   Watch how quickly they get defensive even if it is something silly like Why did you come 15 min early.
     Ok I think I have blogged out most of the need to blog I had this morning, so I will come back again some time soon.