The cardiologist said they will try 1 more tee and if I still have the clot he is giving up trying to do the ablation. I have pushed the date back twice now for the tee test first because my brother was having an operation. Second because I really do not want to be around hospitals at this time if I do not have to do it. Third I really do not trust the doctor as much as I did when this all started, not because he has not cleared the clot, but because he tried to slip a pace maker in on me and I had never agreed to that. It is kind of hard to trust a doctor who does not listen to you when you make a logical argument against something you do not need, and they try to do it anyhow. I have seriously been thinking of getting a different doctor if the clot has in fact cleared when I get it checked the last time. At this point I am thinking it has calcified, and I may be stuck with it forever.
But the news is not all bad something has been blocking much of my anxiety. I do not know if it is the meds I am on right now or if it is the meditation exercises I have been working on for months, but something is keeping me calm even when my heart rate rises a bit. I actually feel better both mentally and physically then I have in years. I have even lost a little weight. My family and friends have noticed the weight loss. It is not much only about 25 to 30 llbs, but it is a start :) My regular cardiologist said if I lose weight it would help the afib, so here's hoping.
On an unrelated subject gandekeogh I tried to reply to your private messages, but you apparently have incoming messages blocked, but I did get them and thank you.